HOW TO BE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN
“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.”
~Thich Nhat Hanh
Doing a boudoir shoot is probably one of the most daunting photography sessions. You want to do it but you are not comfortable in your own skin and you want to get over that. But how? When my client comes in for her boudoir session, most often she is clearly nervous. We stop everything, and I ask to look at me and concentrate on what I have to say. “Take a deep breath from the diaphragm and release it slowly. And again. And one more time.” “How do you feel?” “Better,” she responds. I realized at that time, meditation is a powerful tool to help you get to where you need to be because trust me when I tell you, “Beauty comes from the inside out.” The problem is not the exterior. The problem is what is happening on the inside. When I realized that, I knew I was onto something big to help my clients become more comfortable in their own skin. I highly recommend a daily does of mediation for however long it may take you. I always strive for 10 minutes at the beginning of my day. If you are not mediating, find resources that will help you. In the meantime, here are a few other steps to help you get you started in the right direction:
1. STOP SEEKING VALIDATION FROM THE OUTSIDE AND START SEEKING IT FROM THE INSIDE
We all do it! We rely on our partners for assurance, our parents, our family members, our bosses, our co-workers, our girlfriends. In other words, our circle. It’s lovely getting validation and it is important; however, the danger lies with putting your self worth into 100% of other’s opinion of you. Sooner than later, you will be disappointed in what they say and ultimately disappointed in you. Stop it! Their opinion doesn’t matter one way or the other. Think of it this way; putting your value into other’s people way of thinking of you, you immediate lose your own power!!
2. FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT
Practice self love every day even if you don’t believe it. Do it every single day and trust me faking it until you make it works every time! All you have to do is think positive thoughts about you! Make note of one thing you love about yourself each day and concentrate on that one thing. I sometimes use post it notes on my mirror, my computer, my desk..in my car, in the kitchen to remind myself of what a badass I am!!! Sooner or later, it will kick in and one day you will realize that you made it!!!
3. BUILD YOUR OWN SELF WORTH (INSECURITY, SELF DOUBT, DISCOMFORT)
4. WORK ON WHAT YOU CAN CHANGE AND ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANNOT
5. BLOCK OUT THE NOISE AROUND YOU
6. PRACTICE SELF LOVE
Treat yourselves the way you would treat others!! STOP, LISTEN, TAKE NOTE of what you are saying to yourself. Once you consciously start doing that, you will change the way you see yourself. Forgive yourself. Say it out loud! Be kind to yourself! Do nice things for yourself.
7. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE
8. FIND A GOOD SUPPORT GROUP
Annapolis Boudoir VIP Facebook Group is a good place to start!
REMEMBER: BEAUTY COMES FROM WITHIN . . .
and not the other way around.
Now that you have read this far and are on the verge of seeing yourself in a new and positive light, I recommend you read the following blog post for inspiration:
Love and light,
Linda